I read this on a Facebook post a while ago; I’ve seen it before but it’s great to be reminded of this wisdom. It’s for a woman who has lost her male partner, but obviously you can amend it to read whatever is appropriate for you in your situation.
You can shed tears that he is gone, or you can smile because he lived.
You can close your eyes and pray that he will come back, or you can open your eyes and see all that he has left.
Your heart can be empty because you cannot see him, or you can be full of the love you shared.
You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday, or you can be happy because of yesterday.
You can remember him and only that he is gone, or you can cherish his memory and let it live on.
You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back, or you can do what he would want:
SMILE, OPEN YOUR EYES, LOVE, AND GO ON.
Even though it may be painful, you do have a choice, as this poem states.
I remember I had to deliberately turn my thoughts away from some of the more vivid painful memories of my husband, to consciously choose to love and go on by actively thinking of a more pleasant memory. Sometimes that made my cry too. But at least I wasn’t feeling bad about something that I couldn’t change.
I invite you to do this today – to make a conscious choice to put into practice this idea of ‘love and go on’.
Take one small action towards this: ring a friend and have a coffee, join the Gifted By Grief Facebook group, or do one thing for yourself that you know your loved one would have liked you to do.